When you work in the deck division on a ship you will probably end up having multiple division officers before your time is up.  They rotate them to different jobs on board the ship to ensure proper cross training.  You know, in case someone gets killed, another officer can jump right in and do their job.

Well, I had my share of division officers but there was one in particular that really stood out.  He had just became our official division officer and not even a couple weeks into it he decided it would be a good idea to have a division party.  I am sure he thought it would be a good idea to take us out of our element and get to know us on a more personal level.

So on a Friday night, we decided to go to one of our favorite places at the time.  Hooters! lol  We loved to go there and get good deals on pitchers and bulk up on some of their “famous” wings.  Not to mention, the lovely ladies that worked there were always something to look forward to.

We get there and right off the bat we order some wings and many pitchers of their finest imported beer.  He had mentioned that it was on him and not to worry about the cost.  He had a credit card, and being the young punks we were, we took full advantage of that situation.

Pitcher after pitcher we began to get pretty hammered.  All night we had been egging the division officer on.   He was tossing plenty of em’ back as all good sailors do.  Unfortunately, it began to get late and the party was coming to an end.  Slowly different parties began to exit and go about their nightly routine or back to the ship to sleep it off.

Guess who the remaining people just happen to be…yep.  The division officer and I.  He was stumbling out of the bar and was trying to his car.  He gets to his car and starts fumbling with the keys, trying to get them in the lock of the driver side door.  All the while scratching the door of his Beemer.  Being the responsible drunk person I was I told him it wasn’t a good idea to drive.

I told him I would not let him drive and got in between him and the door.  He stopped, looked up at me and said, “Oh yeah, Moreno??? Well, why don’t you drive?“, as he handed me the keys to the car.

I said to him along with a smile and giggle under my breath, “I could probably drive better than you can.“  So again like the responsible drunk person I was I got in the car and started it up.

Keep in mind I was 18 at the time, did not have a license, and had only driven a car one other time.

So off we went!  The plan was to take him back to the ship, but then we got to talking and he said he wanted to go to the beach and find some chicks.  I ended up agreeing, so we turned around and set off into the unknown.  I was trying to be really careful because I was nervous about the fact that I obviously “bit off more than I can chew”.

At this time the officer decided he was going to start vomiting on the floor of the passenger side of his own car!  I got to thinking about it and the nervous feeling began to consume me until I snapped back into reality.  I realized the whole situation was a really bad idea so I decided I was going to turn around and go back to the ship.  That is when disaster struck.

As I began to make a left turn around an island I didn’t turn the steering wheel back fast enough to level out and BAM!  I hit the curb with the left front tire and drove up on the island for a split second until I straightened the wheel out and plopped back onto the rode.  The officer sensed something was wrong (maybe it was the loud slamming noise of the tire hitting the curb) and he asked me what happened.  I told him it was nothing and that we just hit a bump.

He didn’t believe me at first but I was able to convince him everything was ok.  I needed to get back to the ship and end this stupid situation.  Now, pretty much sober in my mind, with adrenaline pumping viciously I continued on back to the ship.  We were a few miles away.

Everything was going good until disaster struck again and the tire went flat.  By this time, the officer was passed out in the passenger seat.  I woke him up and told him that the tire was flat.  I also asked him if the car had a spare so I could change it.  So we pulled over at the nearest gas station. Wouldn’t you know it, the spare was locked in a compartment in the trunk and he didn’t have the keys!

We tried using that fix a flat stuff but it barely made difference.  He mentioned that the rims were supposed to be drivable rims.  His little nap had sobered him up enough that he started thinking straight.  He realized the situation and began to tell me I needed to leave.  He said that he was acting really irresponsible and that I needed to get back to the ship.  We both could get into a lot of trouble for what we were doing.

I agreed, took a cab back to the ship, and fell asleep.  The next day I woke up went to quarters, but he did not show up.  I figured he was probably really hung over and went on sick call or something.  That turned out to be not true and he didn’t show up on Sunday either.

I started to get worried.  I kept thinking to myself, he got hurt or was in jail.  Maybe he got in trouble and got kicked out of the Navy.  Finally Monday rolls around and he shows up.  That morning after quarters we had a little private chat regarding the situation.  The first thing he said to me was that he was really sorry about being irresponsible and that and he should of never allowed me to be in that situation.

Then he asked me what happened.  He said he did not remember a lot of what happened that night.  He said he only remembers driving until he got pulled over by the base police.  I couldn’t help but to laugh when he told me this next thing.  He said he got pulled over because he was speeding!  The cops said they noticed his tired was flat, but what concerned them was the fact that he was speeding while driving on the rim!

I came clean and told him that I had lied to him and it was my fault why the tire got flat.  He said, “I don’t care.  I am not mad at you at all!  I am just glad you didn’t get hurt or in trouble“.

In other words, he was trying to redeem himself in being a responsible officer.  I did not blame him.  It was the fault of both of us.  I should of never grabbed the keys and called a cab for both of us instead.

He never told me what consequences he faced due to the command finding out about the situation from the base police.  I am sure it wasn’t good.  I never heard anything else about it after that.  I figured he kept my name out of it all.  Anyway, it was no doubt a night I will remember for the rest of my life.

I always think about how much worse that situation could have been and that I was lucky to have made it out without injury or DUI, etc.  Imagine if I let him drive in his state and he crashed on the way home.  Getting really drunk and driving is a complete moron thing to do, especially when you don’t know how to drive and have no license.  No matter who you are or how well you THINK you can drive, it is not a good decision.

Keep this story in mind the next time you decide to drink.

No matter where I go, I always end up finding a new best friend.  I no doubt talk to many people, but there tends to always end up being one or two people that I really get along with.  In this case it was E.

E was simply, crazy.  That is the word that comes to mind when trying to sum up this guy’s personality.  He was Sicilian and had a bad attitude.  He was arrogant, mean, tough, funny, passionate but likable too.  He was the type of guy who was not afraid to tell you how he felt.  He was a real stand up guy.

We went out drinking one time and became friends right away.   We became like brothers and started doing everything together.  We had enormous amounts of fun working and partying together.  He was a native to Florida so he showed me all around the state and introduced me to places like, Tampa, Daytona, Orlando and Sarasota/Bradenton.

He were different people but boy did we love to get drunk together and cause havoc.  We often went to clubs and bars and drank until we passed out somewhere.  I was probably the worst at this part.  For some reason I often drank to the point of falling sleep in awkward or embarrassing positions and places.  It is amazing that I managed to avoid any major problems because of this.

We both loved to smoke also.  He smoked New Ports and I smoked Marlboro reds.  I actually didn’t enjoy smoking that much.  I was more addicted to the action and nicotine than anything.  There were times when cigarettes were enjoyable, like after a meal or a work out but most of the time it sucked.

At one point we had our own apartment off base.  Boy was that a party pad.  That is all we pretty much did in there.  Now that I looked back we really didn’t do much but go out all the time and get hammered.  We didn’t really think about anything else.  We were constantly moving and looking for the next way were going to have a good time.

There is not much more I can say about E.  He was my right hand man.  My partner in crime.  We laughed our asses off right through the three years we spent together on the ship.  We went through tough times together and always had each others back.  Just a couple of young punks with no purpose in life but to lose control and enjoy ourselves.  We didn’t have a care in the world.  I miss that…

In the next post I will talk about Mess Cranking. Hard work, let me tell you…

Click here for previous posts in this series. The U.S. Navy boot camp is run out of Great Lakes, Illinois.  It is a place with square shaped concrete buildings that look kind of like an old school grounds.  When you first get there you go through an initial processing phase that last about days.  I thought MEP’s was pretty horrible standing in lines for 12 hours.  When you arrive at Great Lakes you do this for 3 days straight with almost zero sleep!

The Arrival

I remember getting off of the bus when we arrived, and gett yelled at to go straight into a line.  There was constant yelling from drill instructors and senior recruits to shut up and not speak until asked a question.  There were many lines of recruits at different stations for different things.  Below is a list of things that you must do before you are processed into boot camp:

• Fill out a zillion forms to create your first service records
• Get a hair cut
• Send back all your civilian stuff
• Get your first uniform (Sweatsuit called SMURF’s)
• Take a urinalysis
• Get yelled at a lot
• A lot more things

The first thing you do is fill out tons of forms to create this detailed service record.  I remember hating this the most.  After creating the records they send you over to a new station where you get to pick up your first uniform.

The Smurfs

This is the first military uniform you will wear.  They had about 80 of us in one room and they told us all to strip down completely naked and change clothes.  This was our first lesson in changing in front of other people.   Most of you who played sports in high school will probably be used to this.

The reason it is called smurfs is because its an all blue uniform which makes you look like a smurf.  It is just sweat pants and a sweater and a hat that says recruit on it.  When you walk around the base wearing this uniform you stick out like a paris hilton video sitting on a church pew. All of the other senior recruits will make fun of you and laugh as you march around the base with 80 other guys you never met, trying your hardest to march in line.  I remember watching in awe at the senior divisions marching around in a super tight, flawless group.  Everyone in the division moved so smoothly like one solid entity.  The RDC would tell us that if we listened, we would be like them one day also.

The First Hair Cut

I remember getting my hair cut.  For guys they just shave your whole head with one small clip.  For girls they trim their hair very carelessly to the bottom of the collar.  I distinctly remember most of the girls crying after their hair was cut.  Many guys laughed at them.

The Piss Test

Also, when they gave you a urinalysis they had to see it come out of the source.  At the same time they were watching me, they were insulting me, saying lots of smart ass remarks, and all kinds of uncomforting things that had to do with sexuality, manliness, being gay, size, etc.

No sleep

The very first day you should get 1-2 hours of sleep if you are lucky.  The second night you may get 3-4 and the third night it depends.  When I was there I remember getting maybe 1-2 hours of sleep when I was suddenly woke up to get my stuff ready to start the next day.

Assignment

Once you complete all the records and get all of your stuff you will be assigned to an RDC.  RDC is short for Recruit Division Commander.  Your division will have between 1-3 of these guys in charge of you at all times.  Once you get assigned an RDC they will assign you to your bunk where you will sleep(BARELY) for the next 8 weeks.

After it’s all done

Short and sweet.  There isn’t much to it the first three days but a lot of standing in lines and being in fear of everything.  These days go by like a blur and before you know it you are marching around this base wondering what you are doing there. Stay tuned for the next episode of Navy Stories.  In the upcoming posts I will talk about each week of boot camp and what we did.

Read the next episode about the first week of boot camp.